Here I am, 40 weeks and 6 days and little man, obviously, has not made his arrival. I can’t truly say much has changed in the past week, but I can say I’m truly at the point of easy irritation.
It’s hard to not be irritated receiving the exact same question 15 times a day..
How’re you feeling?
I want to respond in the rudest manner I can manage saying the same I was this time yesterday, but I know everyone asking genuinely wants to know, and their not trying to irritate me, they’re just excited, so I bite my tongue and just respond with fine or good. Usually ending the conversation allowing me to return to my blissful avoidance of the world as I sleep for twelve hours, eating every other hour and just keep myself from overthinking what lies ahead.
I continue to worry I’m not ready for motherhood, I’m not ready for the delivery or the life change that now requires me to think of my little one before myself. Feeling selfish for even having these thoughts I keep them to myself. Telling myself I can do this and I will do this, for my son! I will do anything and everything I can to give him a good life.